Explain The Lyrics

I’ve been thrown the gaijin glare for so long
By now i take the scorn in stride
Got no time for pride that only serves to divide
Got no time for miscommunication
I’ve been trying to set this straight for so long
Trying to hammer out what’s bent
You trust in my intent
You must be heaven sent
And i’ve been trying to let you know that i love you so

I’ve been trying to find a girl for so long
That tears have often filled my eyes
Under azure skies as we said our last goodbyes
I was trying to let you know that i love you so

I love you so
You’ll never know
But i love you so

You suck if you love beautiful romantic tunes that will melt your heart and you have not heard this one.  They sing this in English and Japanese.  As far as the lyrics, they are rather self-explanatory, but I can help clear up some vocabulary that you might not know:

“I’ve been thrown the gaijin glare for so long” means he has stood out by being an American who lives in Japan (“gaijin” meaning alien, or foreigner).

“azure” in “azure skies” means a deep blue, which was used for royalty centuries ago.

“Utsukushii Shibuya” refers to the singer’s fond memories of the city he lived in, presumably with his girlfriend.  Utsukushii means beautiful, and Shibuya is a suburb of Tokyo.

Here are the Japanese lyrics, just in case you know them.  By the way, I sang this song in Japanese to my Chinese girlfriend and killed it (in a good way).  You should try it!

gaijin dato yubi wo sasu
tanin (hito) wo mikudasu youna me de
(mizo wo fukame rudakeno)
puranodo ya _ ha no kabe ni kakawatsu teru baai janai
sou, zutsuto, sai kiro utoshiteta
hizun da kokoro (mono) tataki naoshi
kun ha, sonna boku wowakatsutekureru megami
kun ni _ eyou
I love you so…
detsuto, kun wo sagashi _ ke nando mo naki takunatsuta
ano aozora no shita, wakare no kotoba wo majiwa shita
kun ni _ etakatsuta
I love you so…
wasure naide
temo, I love you so…

Ok, here are the Japanese characters, the best I could work out… They are probably not very accurate.  PLEASE comment or email me the right lyrics if you know Japanese.  Thanks!

私は長い間、外国人のまぶしさを投げてきた
今では私はストライドで軽蔑してください
のみ分割する役割を誇りには時間を持っていない
誤解のための時間を持っていない
私はあまりにも長い間、この直線を設定しようとしてきた
曲がっているかを打ち出すこととして
あなたが私の意図で信頼
あなたは天国に送信する必要があります。
と私はそう私はあなたを愛しているあなたが知っているようにしようとしてきた

私はそう長くのための女の子を見つけるためにしようとしてきた
その涙は、しばしば私の目を埋めている
紺碧の空の下で我々は最後の別れは言ったとして
私は、そう私はあなたを愛しているかを知らせることを試みていた

私はあなたを愛して
あなたが知っていることは決してないだろう
しかし、私はとてもあなたを愛して

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=p20buwlisAY#!

I’m wishing the bath water clean
She hides in the back and is unseen
I take off the mask that surrounds me
Look me in the face, what do you see?
I feel like a boy the age of 13
My body grows up,
But my mind stays the same
Look me in the face
What do, you, see?

How do you tell an angel
That you don’t believe in God?
Why do I feel,
Like such a stranger?
I look around,
I look around,
And all my friends are gone

But oh would you be me?
‘Cause I would be you
Oh you’d be happy
Only if you wanted to
And oh would you trade, me?
‘Cause I would trade you
Oh you’d be happy
Only if you wanted to

How do you tell, your Father
That you want him to notice you?
Why does this seem, like such a bother?
When mom says, you’d be better off dead
But I want to see you
I still want to see you
But oh would you call me?
Oh it’s not hard to
I’m the first one
Oh you gave birth to
And oh would you write me
Oh, on my Birthday?
Graduation, oh, oh, was yesterday
Yesterday-
Oh..

How do you hold, the special victim?
When they push you away
When they’ve been
Raped on the inside
Torn on the outside
The dirt and ugly from the stain that they try to hide
Touched in private places
Embarrassed faces
Too scared to ask for help
Why-

But oh would you be me?
‘Cause I would be you
Oh you’d be happy
Only if you wanted to
And how would you treat, me?
‘Cause I would treat you
Oh you’d be happy
Only if you wanted to
You wanted to

I’m wishing the bath water clean
She hides in the back and is unseen
I take off the mask that surrounds me
Look me in the face, and what do you see?

He is torn between a rock and a hard place.   He has the “special victim” who needs his advice/treatment, but he also needs an outlet.  He obviously suffers from parental neglect issues, as is relevant in most other Blue October songs, as well.  ”How do you tell an angel (the special victim) that you don’t believe in God” probably means that he is giving this victim advice that he himself does not even believe, but he knows that it will make him or her better.

How am I supposed to breathe?
I try to relax, I touch your still frame
So I can watch you closer
And study the ways I believe I belong to you
To you
so I, I scratch at your waist line, your doll hair
I dig up the thought of how your eyes glow
So I make you my religion, my collision, my escape goat
So have I found your secret weak spot, baby?

(Chorus)
Can you pretend I’m amazing?
I can pretend I’m amazing
Instead of what we both know
Instead of what we both know
I cut to the punch line baby
Can we pretend I’m amazing
Instead of what we both know

Now our history is for sale
And for that, I apologize
You see, you’re my only know how
The study of when I believed I belonged to you
To you
You see I’ve made you into something more delicious,
My sweet ghost
So have I found your secret weak spot, baby?

Can you pretend I’m amazing?
I can pretend I’m amazing
Instead of what we both know
Instead of what we both know
I cut to the punch line baby
Can we pretend I’m amazing
Instead of what we both know

Sounds like a real life experience Justin is writing about here.  The lyrics in “Amazing” conclude a list of songs on the album “History for Sale” that seem to all reflect on Justin’s relationship with one ex-girlfriend.  In the first song, “Ugly Side,” he introduces his first meetings with the girl.  Conclusively, “Amazing,” the last track on the album, deals with Justin and his girl breaking up and taking a different direction.  He does not explain why she leaves, but the lyrics definitely tell us that he was deeply in love with her.  I wish that everybody knew how great the writing is in Blue October’s music.  Perhaps if they were a bit more positive?

Babe, tomorrow’s so far away
There’s something I just have to say
I don’t think I can hide what I’m feelin’ inside
Another day, knowin’ I love you
And I, I’m getting too close again
I don’t want to see it end
If I tell you tonight will you turn out the light
And walk away knowin’ I love you?

I’m gonna take you by surprise
And make you realize, Amanda
I’m gonna tell you right away,
I can’t wait another day, Amanda
I’m gonna say it like a man
And make you understand, Amanda
I love you

And I feel like today’s the day
Lookin’ for the words to say
Do you wanna be free, are you ready for me
To feel this way
I don’t wanna lose you
So, it may be too soon, I know
The feeling takes so long to grow
If I tell you today will you turn me away
And let me go?
I don’t wanna lose you

I’m gonna take you by surprise
And make you realize, Amanda
I’m gonna tell you right away,
I can’t wait another day, Amanda
I’m gonna say it like a man
And make you understand, Amanda
Oh girl

You and I
I know that we can’t wait
And I swear, I swear it’s not a lie girl
Tomorrow may be too late
You, you and I girl
We can share a life together
It’s now or never
And tomorrow may be too late

And, feelin’ the way I do
I don’t wanna wait my whole life through
To say I’m in love with you

Although we don’t know how the song ends, this was written for the lead singer’s girlfriend.  Whether she told him “yes” or not, the relationship did not work out.  Brad Delp ended up divorced twice, and was about to marry a girl named Pamela when he had enough of life’s troubles.  Delp committed suicide at age 55, leaving a note that only said he had a lonely soul, in French.

[Waitress:] “Hello, you wanna cup of coffee?”
[Customers:] “Heh, Turn that fucking juke box down
You want to turn down that juke box….loud in here”
[Waitress:] “I’m sorry, would you like a cup of coffee?
Ok, you take cream and sugar? Sure.”

In truck stops and hamburger joints
In Cadillac limousines
In the company of has-beens
And bent-backs
And sleeping forms on pavement steps
In libraries and railway stations
In books and banks
In the pages of history
In suicidal cavalry attacks
I recognise…
Myself in every stranger’s eyes

And in wheelchairs by monuments
Under tube trains and commuter accidents
In council care and county courts
At Easter fairs and sea-side resorts
In drawing rooms and city morgues
In award winning photographs
Of life rafts on the China seas
In transit camps, under arc lamps
On unloading ramps
In faces blurred by rubber stamps
I recognise…
Myself in every stranger’s eyes

And now, from where I stand
Upon this hill
I plundered from the pool
I look around
I search the skies
I shade my eyes
So nearly blind
And I see signs of half remembered days
I hear bells that chime in strange familiar ways
I recognise…
The hope you kindle in your eyes

It’s oh so easy now
As we lie here in the dark
Nothing interferes, it’s obvious
How to beat the tears
That threaten to snuff out
The spark of our love

Simply put, this is the 10th of 12 songs about a man who dreams of committing adultery with with a woman while he suffers from a mid-life crisis.  Confusingly put, there are elements of existentialism and Buddhism in the song.  All the “myself in ever stranger’s eyes” references point to these two beliefs, which claim that humans all belong to one universal energy.

In a little while from now
If I’m not feeling any less sour
I promise myself to treat myself
And visit a nearby tower
And climbing to the top will throw myself off
In an effort to make it clear to who
Ever what it’s like when you’re shattered
Left standing in the lurch at a church
Where people saying: “My God, that’s tough
She’s stood him up”
No point in us remaining
We may as well go home
As I did on my own
Alone again, naturally

To think that only yesterday
I was cheerful, bright and gay
Looking forward to well wouldn’t do
The role I was about to play
But as if to knock me down
Reality came around
And without so much, as a mere touch
Cut me into little pieces
Leaving me to doubt
Talk about God and His mercy
Or if He really does exist
Why did He desert me in my hour of need
I truly am indeed Alone again, naturally

It seems to me that there are more hearts
broken in the world that can’t be mended
Left unattended
What do we do? What do we do?

Alone again, naturally
Now looking back over the years
And whatever else that appears
I remember I cried when my father died
Never wishing to hide the tears
And at sixty-five years old
My mother, God rest her soul,
Couldn’t understand why the only man
She had ever loved had been taken
Leaving her to start with a heart so badly broken
Despite encouragement from me
No words were ever spoken
And when she passed away
I cried and cried all day
Alone again, naturally
Alone again, naturally

It is an introspective ballad, starting with the singer telling of his plans to commit suicide after being left at the altar, and then telling about the death of his parents. O’Sullivan has said that the song is not autobiographical, as he did not know his father (who died when O’Sullivan was 11) very well, and that his father had mistreated his mother.

I’m lying alone with my head on the phone
Thinking of you till it hurts
I know you hurt too but what else can we do
Tormented and torn apart
I wish I could carry your smile and my heart
For times when my life feels so low
It would make me believe what tomorrow could bring
When today doesn’t really know, doesn’t really know

Chorus:
I ‘m all out of love, I’m so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I ‘m all out of love, what am I without you
I can’t be too late to say that I was so wrong

I want you to come back and carry me home
Away from this long lonely nights
I’m reaching for you, are you feeling it too
Does the feeling seem oh so right
And what would you say if I called on you now
And said that I can’t hold on
There’s no easy way, it gets harder each day
Please love me or I’ll be gone, I’ll be gone

Chorus

Oh, what are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?
Oh, what are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?

I will not relent no no
Never live with defeat, never falter
It’s like the air that I breathe(like the air I breathe)
I will not choke on failure
Cause I will not choke on failure

I am a mortal man
But I’m not falling, I’m not broken yet
I am a mortal man
But I hold tight to my beliefs now

I have suffered defeat, pain, loss
Still I push to the edge, never falter
For this cements my beliefs (this cements my beliefs)
I’ll remain my own master

I will not relent no no
Never suffer defeat, never falter
For this cements my beliefs (this cements my beliefs)
I will not choke on failure

I am a mortal man
But I’m not falling I’m not broken yet
I am a mortal man
But I hold tight to my beliefs now

I am a mortal man
But I’m not falling I’m not broken yet
I am a mortal man
But I hold tight to my beliefs now

I will not relent
I will not relent, no no
I will not relent
Never suffer defeat never falter
I will not relent, no no

Never suffer
Never falter
I will not relent, no no
Never suffer
Never falter

So I sing you to sleep
After the lovin’
With a song I just wrote yesterday
And I hope you can hear
What the words and the music have to say.

It’s so hard to explain
Everything that I’m feelin’
Face to face I just seem to go dry.
But I love you so much
That the sound of your voice can get me high.

Thanks for takin’ me
On a one way trip to the sun.
And thanks for turnin’ me
Into a someone.

So I sing you to sleep
After the lovin’
I brush back the hair from your eyes.
And the love on your face
Is so real that it makes me want to cry.

And I know that my song
Isn’t sayin’ anything new.
Oh, but after the lovin’
I’m still in love with you.

So I sing you to sleep
After the lovin’
I brush back the hair from your eyes.
And the love on your face
Is so real that it makes me want to cry.

And I know that my song
Isn’t sayin’ anything new.
Oh, but after the lovin’
I’m still in love with you.

Yes, after the lovin’
I’m still in love with you.

Hmmm, after the lovin’
I’m still in love with you.

Life is a waterfall,
we’re one in the river,
and one again after the fall.

Swimming through the void
we hear the word,
we lose ourselves,
but we find it all…

Cause we are the ones that want to play,
always want to go,
but you never want to stay.

And we are the ones that want to choose,
always want to play,
but you never want to lose.

Aerials, in the sky,
when you lose small mind,
you free your life.

Life is a waterfall,
we drink from the river,
then we turn around and put up our walls.

Swimming through the void,
we hear the word,
we lose ourselves,
but we find it all…

Cause we are the ones that want to play,
always want to go,
but you never want to stay.

And we are the ones that want to choose,
always want to play,
but you never want to lose, ooooo.

Aerials, in the sky,
when you lose small mind,
you free your life.

Aerials, so up high,
when you free your eyes,
eternal prize.

Aerials, in the sky,
when you lose small mind,
you free your life.

Aerials,so up high,
when you free your eyes,
eternal prize

oooooooooo , ooooooooooo
oooooooooo,
oooooooooooooooo.